Fluff from the naval of my mind

I have a suspicion that politicians, some of them at least, well, a few – there must be a few – actually do some good in the world. Watching, reading and listening to the news media and the appalling bollocks that politicians spew forth gives pause for thought though. Also, having worked with people who interact with these politicians day-to-day, hearing there firsthand accounts of how astonishingly dysfunctional many of the politicians are, how wholly unsuited to their assigned office they are, how astonishingly ill-informed they are on matters pertaining to their portfolio, I despair.

Don’t get me wrong, every once in a while one sees or hears of a politician actually doing something constructive and even more rarely one who actually knows what they are talking about (regardless of one’s political inclination it is difficult to not acknowledge Vince Cable’s almost prescient comments regarding the financial crises that have befallen the UK over the past couple of years – it’s just unfortunate that he then supports ill considered ideas such as a super-tax on freeholders on properties valued over one million pounds).

The latest offence by a politician is Cameron’s execrable comments on the UK’s “Broken Society”. Dave, Dave, Dave, society is always broken in some respect of other and using the tragic events of Edlington for political advantage is both shallow and reprehensible. Using a tragic, and thankfully rare, crime to promote your own insipid agenda is beneath even the low standards of modern political life.

The problem is not entirely of the politicians making. The media must take much of the blame, as must the public who demand increasing simpler solutions to increasingly complex problems. The sound bite is the staple of the news media. In the words of PR wonks everywhere sound bites like ‘Labour’s broken society’ play well with the masses and the media love them because they fit neatly into a sixty second summary of a bulletin.

Simplistic statements like ‘broken society’ make it sound like something that can be readily fixed when the truth is that societies are never perfect for all its members. There are always groups who see society as broken and no amount of political posturing will change this.

So, if you want to be a media friendly politician I suggest you acquire no skills other than those required to smile on cue. I suggest you prepare a handbook of trite clichéd phrases that can be trotted out whenever a camera points in your direction. When asked about a complex issue, simply reference your handbook of stock phrases and, if at all possible, blame the incumbent government (or, if you are the incumbent government, point out that the opposition have no realistic plan to address the issue, or how they made a mess of things the last time they had power – there is not statute of limitation on this either, even if you have been on power for over a decade it’s still fair game to suggest you are struggling to deal with the legacy of the previous party’s incompetence).

Of course, you may be one of those rare creatures, a politician who actually wants to make a difference. I’m afraid if this is the case you will never rise to high office and will therefore not have an opportunity to actually make a difference.